If Only…

If only…
The start of a most tragic thought through all of humankind
To ponder possibilities of what could come behind
Some desired course of action. Some decision so sublime
Observes no answer for repeated questionings in mind
But simply cycles downward in a whirlpool of the time.

If only I had not done that
If only I were there
If only life were not so tragic, weary, and unfair
If only I could fly away
If only I could flee
If only… With such words as these we grovel and we plea.

If only…
What thoughtless hopeless despondence queries as these depict
When lowly mortals seek to sort all of natures rhyme and writ
It leaves them hopeless. Barely coping- The temerity of it!

If only…
Take these useless words away
That I be not obliged to say
Ever again within my speech
What I was once fooled to believe.

Write them off or discard me
For I have naught that you should need
But save me from those cursed words
And take from me that bitter scourge

If only…
What fiendish mind begat those words?
What thought had he but his own hurt?

There is no ‘if only’ to be had
What you’re given is what you have
Not more not less and if you feel
that probity might somehow seal
a future more desirable
I tip my hat to your pure soul
For you have not yet learned the woes
that life displays when it implodes
then suffocates you with its lies
to crush the innocence you prize.

If only…
Ah quite useless it
But still provocative the rift
That forms within your mind amidst
The echoes that these words emit
To taunt like cold fingertips
Daring you to not forget.

If only…
Not again I say
‘If only’ never comes to stay.


Said And Done

What purpose do these dreams of glory serve this mortal soul?
What reason do we long for stories never to be told.
Wherein lies the benefit of hopes that never come?
Like vapors in a windstorm or two numbers with no sum.
What reason can you give me to persuade me to go on?
Call on fortune, luck, or providence when all is said and done
the future we can no more change of our sad legacy
than can we lift a tidal wave and cast it back to sea.
Examine with me, if you care, and see wherein I find
that all will end as it will end regardless of the time.
One will raise himself erect and find a fortune grand!
yet others strive to clamber up and still they cannot stand.
One resigns himself to fate and gains riches untold!
Another struggles hard to earn yet fails out in the cold.
Justice flies off hastily in face of such comparisons
for balance is a byword lost upon her savage narratives.
What purpose do these dreams of glory serve this mortal soul?
What reason do we long for stories never to be told?
I ask again for honestly I have no answer given
and in truth I fear there is none that my mind could have bidden.
If one chooses to simply live- Exist more apropos.
There’s no difference in his chance to have these stories told.
Why then should one bother in attempts to overcome
when in the end- It’s still the end. When all is said and done.
What purpose do these dreams of glory serve this mortal soul?
What reason do we long for stories never to be told?

The List

While he waited quite alone
for life to start and love to grow
he studied, worked, and simply lived
checking problems off the list.

A list of duties, none sublime,
yet ones that deftly stole his time.
Until the day that he awoke
and found that in his end the hope
to live had come and passed him by
his hourglass was out of time.

Then worn and weary still alone
he wept for life and love unknown
for his obscure mundanity
buried what he’d wished achieve.
Moments flee like leaves wind-tossed
life soon over, love so lost.


I’ve been away for awhile, I know. Life has been rather busy lately but here is a poem that I hope will let you know that you are not the only one who fails. Others do too, and although this poem is rather foreboding, and ominous, it still holds a truth that most of us can relate too.

I hope you enjoy.


Farewell to the dreams of a better year
—they were always too far to be reached
there’s no point in crying for no one will hear
—the walls have already been breached.