Wandering

I’ve wondered as I’ve wandered all over this barren land

If somehow I’ve missed the grandeur that before offered her hand.

I’ve wondered if the roads I’ve taken have all been for naught

And questioned if I should have taken roads that I did not.

I’ve travelled all around this place searching for something more

But now I wonder if it all was right in front of me before.

Did I but leave a trail of tears and heartache in my wake

Just to circumnavigate some place I wished escape?

Did I choose all the battles fought and wars already won

In efforts solely to detract from thoughts of being shunned?

Indeed, I’ve wondered as I’ve wandered all throughout this weary land

And sought for answers to the questions that my mind commands.

But even as these choices bring remembrance to what’s past

They hold no promise that their verity assuredly was cast.

For many are the paths of youth that lead to darkening ways

But were mine any better than those of such marked disdain?

Alas I’ve wondered and I’ve wandered but my soul will never rest–

Searching for these answers and a place to rest it’s head.

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A Choice

This is the road I walk

Doing everything I can do

This is the path I run

Trying to get to you.

– – – – –

These are the choices I’ve made

Always following through

Searching for the brightest way

Leading me on to you

– – – – –

But now there’s a fork ahead

A direction I must choose

One to the right, one left

I don’t know which leads to you.

Where We Are

Traditions held from former days

Lost in isolation’s gaze

Hold a reminiscent place

Even as allegiance sways.

– – – – –

Token mem’ries oft emit

Tranquil thoughts from former gifts

Granted from ignorant bliss

Left behind but ever missed.

– – – – –

Now as time and habits take

Their toll on this pilgrims way

Still roads to the future’s paved

With the choices of today.

Haunted

Beyond the doors of choices made

Those which haunt us through our days

All of laughter fades away

As the tears of yesterday

Spring anew and bloom again

Like those untimely deeds of men

Lacking consequence are splayed;

Life in fullness is disdained.

– – – – – –

The tragedy is all remain

Bound by cords made of the same

Decisions past those of today

Even so while passing blame

For what was done before the chains

And all the choices never made;

As an Adam, Eve they blame

Ignorance their sole refrain.

Never Gone

It’s only when we reach the end

Of all that’s known will we begin

To press into that vast expanse

Of life beyond our present breath

And turn our eyes to future’s new

And welcome thoughts and dreams into

Our lives which once before were stale

Vapid from some windless gale

Of absolute monotony

Our hearts yearning to find reprieve

Our minds wishing for something more-

But fearing we won’t open doors

To where we’ve never gone before.

If Only…

If only…
The start of a most tragic thought through all of humankind
To ponder possibilities of what could come behind
Some desired course of action. Some decision so sublime
Observes no answer for repeated questionings in mind
But simply cycles downward in a whirlpool of the time.

If only I had not done that
If only I were there
If only life were not so tragic, weary, and unfair
If only I could fly away
If only I could flee
If only… With such words as these we grovel and we plea.

If only…
What thoughtless hopeless despondence queries as these depict
When lowly mortals seek to sort all of natures rhyme and writ
It leaves them hopeless. Barely coping- The temerity of it!

If only…
Take these useless words away
That I be not obliged to say
Ever again within my speech
What I was once fooled to believe.

Write them off or discard me
For I have naught that you should need
But save me from those cursed words
And take from me that bitter scourge

If only…
What fiendish mind begat those words?
What thought had he but his own hurt?

There is no ‘if only’ to be had
What you’re given is what you have
Not more not less and if you feel
that probity might somehow seal
a future more desirable
I tip my hat to your pure soul
For you have not yet learned the woes
that life displays when it implodes
then suffocates you with its lies
to crush the innocence you prize.

If only…
Ah quite useless it
But still provocative the rift
That forms within your mind amidst
The echoes that these words emit
To taunt like cold fingertips
Daring you to not forget.

If only…
Not again I say
‘If only’ never comes to stay.

The Keeper

“Before this last time that I leave
take I beg of you this key.
For it alone can free my heart
which I have kept quite set apart
within a stronghold so secure
might and force cannot procure.

Take and hold it here for me
until someone who is worthy
should venture in to claim its prize
releasing then this heart of mine.”
With that she placed that silver key
into the hand of Him unseen.